Year: 2010 (page 55 of 73)

Electronic Memory Space-Lane

April 5, 2010 / / 9 Comments

Trade Wars 2002, image courtesy PC World

Here’s a little tidbit for you young’uns who might be tuning into this little blog o’ mine.

Did you know that there were online games before the Internet existed?

When I was a lad (old man joke, oh crumbs there goes the hip, we’re walking, we’re walking) there were these little dial-up places called Bulletin Board Systems, or BBSs. This was long before anything resembling DSL existed, to say nothing of cable or fiber optics running into people’s homes. So one would dial into the BBS’ on-site modem (and if you only had one phone line, someone would need the phone ten seconds after you try dialing) and look at postings of news, jobs and whatnot. BBS setups also had something called ‘doors’.

A ‘door’ was less a physical portal and more the launching point for an on-line game. Of the many that got started back in the late 80s, one in particular not only stands out in my mind but is also played to this day: Trade Wars.

Last year PC World called it one of the greatest PC games ever. I’m hard-pressed to disagree. With simple text displays and ASCII art, Trade Wars would unashamedly eat up hours of my time, with commodities trading, space combat and interaction with other players. You know, the sort of thing that happens in EVE Online but without having to mine asteroids (at least not that I remember). The fact that this sort of game structure has survived into the graphical MMOG era not just as EVE but also as online and hosted versions of the old Trade Wars engine itself is a testament to the longevity and appeal of its simplicity. It doesn’t get much simpler than “Buy stuff for cheap, shoot anybody trying to shoot you, sell stuff for profit, 40 goto 10”.

I might look into finding a way for Blue Ink Alchemy to play host for a Trade Wars game of its own.

If people would be interested in playing, that is.

This Country Needs More Cadbury

April 4, 2010 / / 1 Comment

Not much else to say today other than “Happy Easter,” so here’s a cat with bunny ears.

Cat with Bunny ears

Zynga vs. The World

April 3, 2010 / / 5 Comments

Sigh.

I was going to write about Maschine Zeit some more, since I spent some time yesterday working on a little promotional material and trying to drum up some interest. It really made me miss a gaming store in Conshohoken called “The Roundtable” that had a great staff, fantastic atmosphere and fun events. I’d be willing to try and help promote that place, too, if they hadn’t closed their doors. I’d even try to reopen them if I had the credit to support a business loan.

Anyway, the reason I’m not is because of a debate that began over yonder regarding Zynga. Basically the argument was that people who play Farmville (among other things) aren’t “hardcore” gamers and thus they’re not legitimate. That’s bullshit, obviously. Video games are video games, from the tiny little indy projects programmed in BASIC to the massive summer releases that rake in millions of dollars from youth just itching to blow an alien’s head off rather than taking it out on their math teacher.

So in that I’m in agreement. But placing Zynga on the same level as other game developers is, to me, comparing apples and oranges. My ire might be increased due to Zynga’s performance in The Escapist’s March Mayhem, where the social network gaming company has defeated NCSoft (creators of Aion), Infinity Ward (Call of Duty), Rockstar North (Grand Theft Auto), Square Enix (Final Fantasy), and are facing off against a favorite of mine, Valve (Half-Life, Portal, Team Fortress, Counter-Strike, Left 4 Dead…)

This irritates me, and I’ll tell you why.

Zynga doesn’t develop games the way those others developers do, or at least they go for a different kind of game. Zynga’s games are technically video games, just like So You Think You Can Dance, Jersey Shore and Millionaire Matchmaker are technically television shoes. They’re aimed at a very specific demographic. I don’t mean to generalize, but a lot of the people who play Zynga’s games know very little about video games in general. They don’t realize how far things have come. They don’t understand why someone like me can sit back in awe of a Mass Effect 2 or Super Mario Galaxy or No More Heroes when things like Asteroids and Galaxian were the height of gameplay innovation.

To put it another way, here’s a post made over on the Escapist by one Catherine Lyons:

It’s about the culture America (and even the world) is taking that the cheap and tawdry is more important than the innovative and artistic.

“Twilight” gets throngs of fans, who understand nothing of the true genre (one fan even wrote about how Universal’s “Wolfman” was a rip off (despite the fact Universal was remaking a movie they produced back in 30s(? don’t know the exact year), and flamed them because “how could a silver bullet kill a werewolf?” and “the transformation sucked. Look at Jacob for how a real werewolf is supposed to look and morph like.”) It’s mediocre writings set a low standard for it’s fans, and they can’t recognize good material if it doesn’t have a romance between moody teenagers.

Other movies are giving into the “zomg3D” craze where movies that have nothing to really gain from a 3D environment slap together a 3D version just because they can.

TV is getting bogged down with melodramatic crap. The Hills, Secret Life of the American Teenager, Tyra.

WoW is watering down WoW (and by extension, the entire MMO community) with hand-holding and catering too much to their non-gamer base.

Even the news is more celeb gossip and political flaming than actual journalism.

We idolize people like Paris Hilton and the Kardashians, and teach our children from a young age “Be a slut. It’s the cool thing to do. Aspiring to be the concubine of a man in his 80s is a worthy goal.”

Every day, the general populace moves further and further away from anything that makes them think, exert effort, or engage in more than a non-superficial way, and more towards the inane and uninspired.

Gaming seemed to be the last bastion of hope for artistic medium. Despite problems with WoW and Zynga bringing in people that know nothing of gaming into the gaming world and making them think that they know what they’re talking about, it seemed that our games were just getting better and better. More attention to detail, better plot lines, better gameplay.

Now, to see Zynga, who, for reasons I won’t re-enumerate here, doesn’t even deserve to be in this competition (and my assumption is that they were only thrown in there to fill a spot, and expected to quickly get kicked out) win against game houses who have reshaped the industry (Infinity Ward’s Call of Duty is one of the most popular war-based FPS’s out there, Rockstar has consistently pushed the envelope in terms of content and has redefined the idea of a video game again and again, and Square Enix has put out some very popular series that hold a special place in the hearts of many gamers) is like a film fanatic watching Twilight go up for Best Picture. Or a music fanatic watching Kidz Bop go up for a Grammy.

It’s watching our art from get pushed down with the rest of the world in this new world-order of “Thinking is, like, hard and stuff.” and watching as our passion falls to the tawdry mediocrity that is drowning our entire culture.

Anyway, that’s my two rather pretentious cents on the whole Zynga thing, and if they win March Mayhem I won’t be terribly surprised. Just disappointed.

IT CAME FROM NETFLIX! Reservoir Dogs

April 2, 2010 / / 0 Comments

Logo courtesy Netflix. No logos were harmed in the creation of this banner.

[audio:http://www.blueinkalchemy.com/uploads/r_dogs.mp3]

Every now and again, when you start taking on work as a critic, it’s beneficial to remind yourself of what’s good in your chosen medium and why it’s worth defending. It’s why I’ve been playing Half-Life 2 again lately. That’s also the reason why Reservoir Dogs was bumped to the top of my Netflix queue. Well, that, and there’s the fact that my wife hadn’t seen it yet and she’s even more critical of films than I am. If something can get past her radar, it’s pretty damn good. And Reservoir Dogs passed with flying colors.

Courtesy Miramax
From right to left: Mr. Blonde (Michael Madsen), Mr. Brown (Quentin Tarantino), Mr. White (Harvey Keitel), Nice Guy Eddie (Chris Penn), Joe (Lawrence Tierney), Mr. Orange (Tim Roth) and Mr. Pink (Steve Buscemi)

An independent film darling & cult classic, Reservoir Dogs depicts the events leading up to a jewel heist and its aftermath. LA gangster Joe Cabot and his son, Eddie, have put together a team of six men to intercept a shipment of Israeli diamonds from the shop serving as a way station. The team are all instructed to use aliases, based on colors and picked out by Joe because, as he points out, having four guys fight over who gets to be Mr. Black isn’t a good way to start a caper. Of the six men who undertake the job, Mr. Brown & Mr. Blue are killed, Mr. Orange is mortally wounded but in the care of Mr. White, Mr. Pink stashes the goods and Mr. Blonde abducts a cop. Mr. Pink suspects an informant, but Mr. White’s concern is the survival of Mr. Orange. With Eddie and his father en route to resolve things, Mr. Blonde interested in ‘entertaining’ his guest and any one of them possibly being an undercover cop, the disparate stories are set on a collision course with one another.

Courtesy Miramax
“Donny, you are out of your element!”
(Whups, wrong movie.)

This is where it all began for Quentin Tarantino. This was the film in which he demonstrated his skills as both a writer and a director. As a writer, there are certain hallmarks to his work other than the liberal profanity. His dialog tends to weave in and out of itself as much as his storylines do, but never seems to feel unnatural or even overly rehearsed. Despite some of his characters being unashamedly larger than life, they talk the way normal people talk. Both his characterizations and the references to movie pop culture underscore a deep love for all thing cinema but especially for the likes of Lee Marvin, Charles Bronson, Steve McQueen and other so-called ‘low’ film genres.

This affinity also informs the way in which Tarantino directs. While one might dismiss some of his films as ultra-violent cuss-heavy fodder for the masses, his camera work and shot composition reveals a deeper meaning to his films. Tarantino isn’t really overly concerned over what these characters do, but who they are. Sure, sometimes he can get a little self-indulgent and gratuitous in some of his work (I’m looking at you, Kill Bill vol. 1) but overall, while action and gratuity exist they don’t normally do so for their own sake. Quick cuts during action sequences compared to long, intimate shots of conversations show that this is an artist who’s not only exercising his talent, but also trying to convey a message, even bearing his soul from time to time.

Courtesy Miramax

All of these elements are present in Reservoir Dogs, and while it isn’t as quotable a classic as Pulp Fiction, it is an extremely solid work with excellent acting and a great pace. While the story highlights Tarantino’s trademark nonlinearity, it never becomes hard to follow. We come to know most of these men pretty well in the short time we spend with them. Everybody’s flawed and nobody’s heroic, making this a great ensemble work instead of a lead actor with good supporters. Quentin Tarantino tried some things here that, at the time, were pretty new in this realm of cinema, and to this day people are emulating his work.

There’s nobody to whom I can’t recommend this film. Noir fans are going to love this throwback to the days of dime novels with hard-boiled manly figures moving from scene to scene with square jaws and black ties. Film students will find a lot of inspiration in the writing, cinematography and overall directorial sense. Fans of the actors will see them at their prime, working off of one another for extremely natural and well-done scenes. The violence can be visceral at times, and in fact, at the Sundance screening Wes Craven and special effects artist Rick Baker walked out, considering the violence to be unnerving due to its high level of realism. So the only people who won’t be seeing Reservoir Dogs are squeamish folk and those who aren’t fond of people using a lot of cuss words. However they are seriously missing out. As I said, this is the kind of thing I watch just to remind myself of what good film-making is all about and why it’s a delight not only to see good new films but also to rip bad films a superfluous orifice. As a matter of fact, from now on when I talk about this film, I’m going to drop ‘cult’ from its descriptor. Reservoir Dogs is a masterful, singular and balls-out classic.

Josh Loomis can’t always make it to the local megaplex, and thus must turn to alternative forms of cinematic entertainment. There might not be overpriced soda pop & over-buttered popcorn, and it’s unclear if this week’s film came in the mail or was delivered via the dark & mysterious tubes of the Internet. Only one thing is certain… IT CAME FROM NETFLIX.

Bleep the Bleeping Bleepers

April 1, 2010 / / 2 Comments

Expletives, courtesy Cerebral Itch

People I know tend to cuss an awful lot. I don’t, for reasons I’ll explain later, but it occurs to me that people are talking about and doing some funny shit today for some reason. And cussing can be hilarious if done right. Doing it right requires discussion, though, because for some, cussing is like a firearm and giving someone a gun without talking about gun safety is likely to have someone wondering what just happened to their foot, if not their face.

So before another jaw gets blasted off by a stream of interesting verbiage, let’s talk about some fucking profanity.

Cluster F-Bombs

The F Bomb

The aforementioned close acquaintances use ‘fuck’ pretty liberally. In fact if you get them going on a particularly passionate rant, ‘motherfucker’ pretty much takes the place of the comma. This can be pretty funny in the right hands. Good writers can use profanity for the sake of wit. People like the aforementioned, Yahtzee and David Thorne.

The problem is a lot of people who aren’t good writers seem to think that your level of wit is directly proportional to the amount of cussing you use in your writing. This has caused some to consider the liberal use of ‘fuck’ as a sign of low intelligence. “Smart people have better ways to express themselves,” is one sentiment I’ve heard expressed. While I agree that most people tend to abuse this rather versatile word, I don’t think a case can be made that anybody who uses it with abandon is dumb. Just most people. Since most people are pretty fucking stupid. I mean, have you seen the way they fucking drive? It’s like they’re behind the wheel of their fucking Porsche going, “GEE I REALLY HOPE I CAN MAKE IT TO MY SALES MEETING IN TIME, THOSE TPS REPORTS REALLY NEED TO BE DISCUSSED BUT FIRST I NEED MY DOUBLE MOCHA CHAI LATTE BECAUSE I’M JUST NOT FUCKING PRETENTIOUS ENOUGH TODAY SO GET OUT OF MY WAY HARD-WORKING PERSON IN A REASONABLY-PRICED CAR BECAUSE I’M MORE FUCKING IMPORTANT THAN YOU ARE.”

As you can see, I’m not one to use ‘fuck’ all that liberally. Funnily enough, that kind of carpet-bombing of the word can be hit or miss for me. I tend to go a different route with my use of profanity.

The Precision F-Strike

Barrett M95 .50 caliber rifle of fuckawesomeness

See this? This is my weapon of choice. In general I like rifles, and specifically the Barrett anti-matériel rifle makes me salivate in a pretty disturbing way. Now, imagine that the .50 caliber slug in the chamber of that bipod-mounted beast has the word FUCK engraved on it.

That’s how I roll.

The way I write and speak, I’m not given usually to lay on the profanity on a liberal basis. Rather, I save the cussing for the sake of emphasis. That doesn’t mean I’m afraid of it or anything. In fact, if I get worked up over something enough, or start over-reacting, the select fire switch on my .50 caliber delivery system of FUCK will go from “single” to “burst fire” or even “fully automatic.” In normal conversation, though, and especially when doing something like IT CAME FROM NETFLIX!, I’m pretty patient. I get going on a particular point. I let the words flow in the right direction. I wait for it. And then, just when the moment is right, I hit that fucking sweet spot.

What it boils down to is that you need to be aware of what you’re good at. Some people are great at weaving profanity into the flow of their writing even through liberal use for comedic effect. Others punctuate particular passages with it to drive their points home. It’s going to vary from person to person, and using it doesn’t necessarily make you stupid.

Supporting things like this and calling Obama ‘irresponsible’ because he wants to make health care affordable for every US Citizen, that tends to make you a fucking dumbass. Because you know the folks out there who love their country, their guns and their Rush & Glenn & Sarah will take those little sights to mean those dirty hippy fascist socialist Democrats need to be shot to make room for right-minded God-fearing flag-saluting honest politicians who’ll put Jaysus and the Yoo-nited States first so let’s go get ’em, pardners! YEEEEEE HAW!

You know it’ll happen. Because people are fucking dumbasses.

Shit. Politics made it into my blog again.

Ah well. At least I have Jack Bauership, thanks to the new guy at work.

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